Yesterday was World Kindness Day. Many posted the reminder to be kind. Perhaps the world was a little kinder yesterday because of it. Words, deeds, and gestures of kindness need to be done and felt every day, not just once a year when we put out reminders.

I would like to focus it on a more challenging emotional, “in your soul” can be difficult challenge. Because, the need is out there, in homes, in communities, and in places all around the world and I desperately want to blur the divide. It cannot be done without true kindness.

Where we are

For so many, a line has been drawn between the vaccinated and those who are not. Valued relationships have been ended and anger has been spilled. But we do not stand on one side of the line. We are all mixed together – by families, communities, workplaces and anywhere else our presence is. We are blended together whether we choose to be or not. For most at this point, a perspective has been chosen. You have little chance to convince.

What do you do with that?

“Be the kindness you wish to see in the world” is a challenge for those who see the other side is the enemy or the threat. Your belief does not justify the actions of being unkind. Not if you view kindness as essential. It just makes it more of a commitment. Both sides comes with a fear. Both sides come with some uncertainty. Both sides can be right and wrong – and it’s never a pass to be unkind.

So I ask you, now that World Kindness Day has ended, and the focus has faded, could you make a commitment to blur the line of an adversary perspective and simply practice kindness? Let’s not look at each other as enemies and instead understand that we are all in this together.

Advocate with your heart, but without an adversary approach. Use compassion, not contempt. How will you present yourself to the world? Kindness is up to us.

Written by Melody Belliveau

Today is the holiday that gifts the ability to learn the healing of shadow work. It’s a day to give reverence to the true people of the land and acknowledge the consequences of our ancestors limited views. Ironic that we teach some of it to our children in Disney’s movie Pocahontas, (although the story itself is filled with untruths), yet as adults we dismiss the very concepts they speak of in the movie.

Mother Nature

The earth is not something to be owned, but respected. We are all in this together and are connected to nature and each other. Oh how we could have learned so much from them! Did you know that nature has elements of healing for us? From Qi Energy, plant and herbal remedies, to their respect for the moon and the sun.

Did you know Columbus brought with him an imbalance to the land he wasn’t able to see? He didn’t realize coming to this land was an opportunity to learn a new perspective of life that he was missing. Instead his people began the force of his only view on others.

Today, see if you can learn something new about the natives of the land, that you wish your ancestors had learned. Dig deep and then share it. Show people the gold nuggets of wisdom they hold in their heritage.

What I see

For me, they believe in the herbs of the land. It is not the prescription medications that made a difference in my health. It was simply an herb. Why don’t we look there first, instead of when nothing else works? There is so much to learn of Mother Nature’s healing ability to heal us when we align with it.

Mother Nature and the respect for her have been the greatest message I have learned from our Indigenous People, our true Natives. We need that message desperately, as even the scientists are pointing out.

You matter

And today, on your day of reverence, I see you, and I honor you. You have so much to teach us, and I for one, want to learn from you. We all need you to teach us the wisdom our ancestors wouldn’t listen to. Some of us are ready to receive it.

Written By Melody Belliveau

9/11 We will never forget

Twenty years ago, our country was thrown into a state of unity through shock, horror, sadness and grief. A day that started out as simply routine in our busy lives. Those who were here remember exactly where they were when the unimaginable became a reality. Many watched live in horror, while others watched from live TV breaking news.

We responded with compassion and vulnerability for each other, and American pride sprang up in an instant and a unity took place that is rarely seen. The tragedy was bitter but there was a light that came into view because of it.

The Heroes Journey

Our first responders, veterans, and even civilians dove into the role of the heroes journey in an instant, working beyond normal capabilities. Many gave their lives selflessly and other family generations grew as a result of those that had been saved.

Today

Videos and photographs have been shared through the day that brought tears to many eyes. The Grand Ole Opry did an Opry Livestream tribute in partnership with The Wounded Warriors Project. Songs were sung and words were spoken that could be felt in one’s soul. I Dare You To Love was one of those songs. I take up the challenge and ask you to do the same.

Can we make this remembrance a chance to put down our differences and feel our shared vulnerabilities that were once raw in our very beings? Can we stop seeing each other through the lens of divide and contempt for each other? Don’t look at each other as red or blue, black or white, native or immigrant to look down on.

The left out

We left out a group of Americans and visitors to our country following that event. We saw them , not by their soul or character, but by the resemblance to our enemy. We scorned them instead of embracing them with empathy for what they were also going through. Can we look at them now and see their soul? Can we use this reverence to welcome in the refugees we’ve taken in now? They feel the terror of war and are in need of making this their country and home.

Who we are

We are capable of it. We have seen what we are made of. We can make it even more powerful than it was 20 years ago. In the present climate, it’s a challenge that will take intention. Let us hold on to it for longer than a day, a week a month or even a year, or maybe even 20. Today showed us we can. I dare you to love, better than you ever have before.

Let’s let our military and first responders know how much we appreciate all that they do, because when we need them, they are there. Support our heroes……..

And never forget those we’ve lost. They matter and so do you.

Written by Melody Belliveau

Although the pandemic has shown us it’s a small world and we are all in this together, it also became a source of conspiracy theories and mandates as well. Not wearing masks became a political statement and lockdowns for safety were met with protests and even violence.

Now we have a new divide…

Those who are vaccinating, and those who won’t. Families are being torn and friendships are being lost, because personal beliefs are no longer a value to those vaccinated. They see the unvaccinated as a threat, pitting man against man and friend against friend. So who is in the right? Perhaps they both are right, and both are wrong. Let’s sit in the middle and see how…

The New Freedom

When our numbers started going down we had mask mandates and the new vaccines were being administered. But the mask mandate was lifted with an “honor system” and people started feeling the threat was over. We did not give the virus a chance to die out, but merely a chance to adapt. Going without masks gave it a chance to climb once more, and not only for those unvaccinated, but through those vaccinated who thought their risk was over as well.

So to those viewing the unvaccinated as a threat to society and willing to sacrifice family and friendships over it, consider this…..

If they are social distancing and wearing masks but you are not, you may be the bigger threat. It is a fact that you can catch and spread Delta fully vaccinated. Choosing not to wear a mask or social distance simply because you are not mandated to, does not keep you from catching and spreading it. You feeling the freedom of vaccination is an issue and does not lessen your ability to spread it.

Those who took the jab feel a sense of service to their community and loved ones. Are they being brave and selfless? Absolutely, but wearing masks and following guidelines for all makes them even more so.

Until next year rolls around, (and if they accurately keep track) we won’t know the true effective rate of the vaccines, just as the way we judge each seasons flu shot effectiveness when the season has faded out.

This is all still a new experience for us all, both with COVID as the world has struggled, so the vaccines are as well. There are plenty of uncertainties and questions to go around. What we don’t need is anger and feuding on either side about your choice. Just use the precautions that are becoming evident both sides need. Follow your belief, but always be open to learning more. We all need moral support at this time.

Will you be part of those that practice compassion freely, or will you be part of the fire that burns us down? Each and every one of us has a role to play. Make yours an intentional one. How you treat others doesn’t stop with the ones we agree with, it’s more importantly those we don’t.

This is another chance to show what we’re made of. Do we really want it to be hate? Each of us decides for ourselves, regardless of what we’ve heard or how we feel. Compassion not contempt.

Written by Melody Belliveau

The pictures above are of the seedling of a mighty tree. It is growing in a hole in the sidewalk, and you can tell by the tattered leaves, it’s growth has caused it to be stepped upon. Have others noticed it? Perhaps, but for those stepping on it, probably not.

Its size potential I’m sure is mighty, but will it be able to survive in the hole and grow to what it was meant to be? It’s doubtful because of where it is located. I cannot help but feel sad for it. So what can I do to give it meaning (besides trying to transplant it)? I pondered that question (after all, it is my hashtag #MelodysEyes). What possible message can this tree have for others whether it survives or not?

How about this message perspective….

Most of us have heard the term “Glass Ceiling” in business. The phrase was meant to bring awareness to unfair practices of holding people down, denying them advancement. What is the true cost of the glass ceiling? It is the foot on the mighty. It prevents the beauty and magnificence they were born to be. Those under the “glass ceiling” have mighty potential or they wouldn’t be able to see the glass. Could there be a mighty tree in your company? We will never know the potential someone has until we stop limiting how they grow. Like the seedling in the picture, perhaps relocation is the only way it can grow.

Your environment

What is the environment you are a part of? Does everyone have room to grow or are there those putting their best efforts in to grow, but only being stepped upon in the pathway? Employer or employee, what are you a part of? Are you proud of what it stands for, not just for yourself, but for those around you?

That is the type of conversations that are needed and actions to observe. Do you see those working hard being passed over time and time again? We need to start to notice and question and be a part of that change. Is there a reflection in your business, at any time, “we all know (so & so) deserved that promotion. If It keeps happening they are going to leave.”? A thought, a water-cooler conversation, those are things we need to pay attention to. Not an easy thing to recognize – but important. Sooner or later you might need to react with your own role.

What’s your character?

What kind of character do you have? If that unexpected promotion is offered to you, and deep down, you who know who truly deserved it, what would you do? Would you reflect on the benefits of it to your family and accept it, or would you be able to speak out and tell them why you are turning it down? That could even cause them to see, and become aware of an issue they never recognized. You will never know if you accept it. You will have to choose whether to listen to your soul and see what’s right, or your ego that keeps you in the safety of your own outcome. After all, couldn’t the company get upset if you turn it down?

What about them?

What if that person (a mighty tree in their own) gets stepped on (by you) and they decide to leave because of it? What wound would their absence create in your work environment? Could it even hurt your work because they are gone? Maybe they felt no choice but to look elsewhere to provide the benefits that position offered.

When it comes down to it, does your character allow you to step on someone else’s growth when you know they are trying? That is all on you.

If we all look beyond our own spot and help each other, we become the business family that inspires others. Notice them. It’s the first step to change.

Written by Melody Belliveau

The meanings…

The meaning of Memorial Day has a tendency to mean a wide variety of things to different people, from a day off from school or work (sometimes with pay), or a family barb-a-cue planned with the symbol of the beginning of the Summer season. Although these things may very well be accurate, there is a meaning, the true meaning, that must never be forgotten. Sacrifices have been made by many that we seem to take for granted. They deserve our recognition and respect for all they gave up.

The souls…

It is the Military Soldiers that gave up their lives to serve. They are the true soul of our country. The biggest sacrifice one can give is their life for others and that is what they did. They must never be forgotten. May their souls soar high.

Who they were to others…

It is the spouses of those who’ve given all that are left behind with families to raise and nights alone without them, that now has no happy ending. They must go on with a hollow pain in their chest while they remain strong for their children. Their sacrifice is felt everyday, not just Memorial Day.

It is their service buddies that have managed to return only to find that life will never be the same. Many live with survivors guilt that tears away at the very fabric of their souls. Services they need to live on, of both physical and mental health, are a never-ending struggle to obtain. They are the forgotten and disrespected living among us, unable to understand why.

It is the parents of the fallen that feel the void with every breath they take. No matter what age they were, they were the child they loved. It is a scar on their soul that will be felt until their last breath. It is a pain that can only be accepted, but never erased.

It is the brothers and sisters who see them in the eyes of their children, wishing they could have been there to celebrate the milestones, to enjoy the get-togethers of family celebrations. The heartfelt conversations they now must have sitting by their gravesite instead.

It is the children who mourn the loss of their parent. Never able to seek their advice on life, especially during the difficult challenges they face. They will never see the nod of approval when they accomplish something that stirs feelings of pride. Those tears will remain with them through the many stages of their lives.

The friends who anxiously await their return to fill them in on things they used to chat about that will now only have a reflection of their memories and the last hugs they gave them before their departure.

Those are the ones who are the true meaning of Memorial Day and many will spend it with some time at the gravesite to pay their respects as a way to connect. Where they visit, coins are left on the headstones.

Penny – from those who stopped by to pay their respects

Nickle – from those who attended boot camp with them

Dime – from those who served in the Armed Forces with them

Quarter – from those who were with them when they were killed

So while you take the day to do your celebrating, please take some time reflecting on the Heroes of the true meaning and I urge you to take some time to visit a Soldiers grave and leave a penny and a prayer. Let’s show those left behind the respect of that reflection. My prayer is that every Soldier have a penny left behind on their stone. If you see other silver coins, don’t disturb them but rather say an added prayer for the one who left it.

They matter, every one of them. One of the worst sayings is a Soldier dies twice – one with their sacrifice, and again when they are forgotten. We must not forget them.

Celebrate today, but celebrate the life they gave for everyone. If you know someone who feels this day for who they lost, reach out to them, and let them know they matter.

Written by Melody Belliveau

You notice others

For those of you who feel like little people deep inside and can’t shake the feeling of being insignificant; you matter and I’ll tell you why. You see people. You see souls and can relate. You are the ones who stand out in your own way. It doesn’t matter what your station is in life because you are spread from top to bottom. We’ve all heard the compliment, “He (or she) was so great to meet! He is such a down-to-earth regular guy!” You see each other and you make each other feel it.

Not overlooked

No matter where, shine your light and those who are meant to notice you will. In the 3 pictures, there are 2 beautiful flowers that obviously didn’t care where they were, they shined their beauty. They were not planted and they were not given the best, but it didn’t take away from their beauty.

They are tiny and easy to overlook. But they were noticed, and now, 2 small flowers in the curb are being seen by many (hopefully). I believe that in itself makes them significant, simply by being what they are.

See the beauty in yourself

You need to believe it yourself, deep in your soul and grow beyond the limits of your environment. Find a way to become the you that you were meant to be. You have your own beauty, find a way to own it. You matter more than you know.

Written by Melody Belliveau

The Verdict

Today was an important day, not only for the United States, but for the world as well. A man (whether you think he was walking the wrong path in life or not) was given justice in his death that meant much to many. Perhaps that was his purpose in life, beyond the mortality of it, and as a point, because of it.

His Destiny

His destiny, created a unity and a change that parallels Martin Luther King Jr. Our circumstances do not negate the fact that we all have a purpose. You can look down on George Floyd if you choose. It does not change the impact of his life. This jury chose to show the world EVERY black life matters. By doing so, they chose right from wrong not blue verses black. Our constitution was adopted on Everyone, not just a selected few. It is incoherent that there is a mind set that not every soul does.

Look at the right and wrong of the actions nothing more because that is all we have in this. This is what destiny of change looks like. It is the bigger picture and anyone who minimizes what this means, minimizes the impact. Even Derek Chauvin in his wrongs did much for equality, even if simply to emphasize the traumatizing lack of it.

Our Divide

The unrest, divide, and anger is growing, not only in our country, but around the world. We as “humankind” hold the control……Be…..Kind…… It’s in our united race.

There isn’t a race or label out there that doesn’t have a soul and a purpose. Using the examples of wrong can create an impact of right, but only, by our choice of actions. We need to treat others like they matter, because they do.

Written By Melody Belliveau

Easter weekend is filled with celebrations and posts of both spiritual depth and the Easter bunny and decorated eggs. It is a time of family traditions…..

The loss

Then there are those who’s weekend was cut to the core with loss. They feel the gaping wound to their soul and a heaviness of heart that is just as physical as it is emotional. It is an unbearable pain we have no choice but to bear. The pain is equal the depth of love and that is a testament of honor to them.

Monday mornings can be especially hard going back to a routine when all you want to do is shout and cry. Holding it all in to function is a mighty task and can even lead to physical crisis or even your loss. More heart attacks happen on Monday mornings than any other time, but after a holiday of people celebrating and asking out of politeness about yours can be overwhelming.

Self care

It is a time to remind you that you matter and you need to practice extra presence of self care at this time. You need to feel your breathing with intentional awareness, even when each breath is painful all the way up to your throat. Take deliberate time, even in small increments to feel the emotions that wash over you. Take solitude when you can, and reflect on the love that although physically gone, is a source of love’s energy as long as you choose it to be. Allow both for healthy mourning, for without it, healing is stalled and your physical body will feel like a dam with cracks along it. Choose to guide the thoughts through, both good and bad and slowly savor the the precious memories as they walk through and tarry there.

The Blessing

Remember, they Blessed you with the love that they could for the time they were given, and an energy of them is infused in your heart and has been, since the first time you felt them “touch your heart”. Use it to reach towards the light they saw in you. It can help you through the heavy broken darkness, and will comfort your soul.

Apollo, my furry baby boy

Given that “it is better to have loved and lost than to have never loved”, I would not have traded this pain for one minute of the love we shared. You will always be in my heart, Apollo. You were my furry baby boy and I thank you for showing me you felt it too … every … single … day. I will go on and make you proud. Even without you here physically, my heart’s beating must go on for both of us now. May your spirit soar high. I will always love you.

Written by Melody Belliveau

We all have a soul light, some just overlook it. But how does that reflect on who we are?

Listen to what they speak

If you interact with someone for the first time (or even after) are you looking at their differences of skin color? Can you look into their eyes, listen to what they speak? Could you see yourself talking to them over coffee about a joint project that could make the world a better place? If not, could you reflect on why, looking at yourself and not them?

What do you speak?

If your friend introduced you to someone who matters to them, what and who would they see? Would you present them with a “best behavior” front or would that truly represent who you are? What if they were of a different skin color? Would that change your response to meeting them? That’s what they are trying to show you any way they can. PLEASE ponder this and really look at not them, but you. That is the only way change occurs. It has to come from the heart. Examine yours. You can’t be true to you if you don’t really look.

We miss amazing connections

Everyone who has become a valuable friend and confidant was originally a stranger. Sometimes we miss amazing connections because we don’t see them in the light they had. That is our loss. If you meet someone and think less of them simply because of what you see and not who you see, you miss out on some incredible inspiration. There are jewels among them that are bright and beautiful.

Cheating yourself

You may be cheating yourself out of your destiny. We are all meant for something special. It only takes that one right connection. You have no idea who the universe will send for you. Considering yourself better than others may block that connection. Then the issue would really be you, not them. Is that who you are, or do you look for the shine in others? Perhaps there is a mindset that needs adjustment in yourself.

Black History Month

Those who’s eyes sparkle with pride in Black History Month, I applaud you for your strength and beauty in all you are. I am a better me because of your inspiration and I thank you for that. Those of you with quality of character, knowing who you are despite the many challenges along the way, celebrate like the joy you were meant to be. Know that there are many fully behind you of every color.

Written by Melody Belliveau